Is Life With Sheryl That Bad, Lance?

No. But apparently France is acting a little, well.... French. And in doing so, they're getting a rise out of Armstrong.

"...the recent smear campaign out of France has awoken my competitive side."

Some rules for the French:
1. Don't taunt the Knights of the Round Table (especially not a second time).
2. Don't placate and aid mass-murdering Nazis.
3. Don't piss off cancer surviving cyclists who have consistently wiped your ass up and down the mountains of your very own country.

I'm really not big on athletes who retire for two weeks only to then make a statement that they're reconsidering that decision.

But if it means that Lance may once again clean up the Tour de France, I'm all for it.