Some of you may have noticed that over on the sidebar there is a counter in the "About Me" section counting up. Pretty self-explanatory as to what it signifies - had my last smoke Sunday night around 10pm (couldn't configure the hours, so it's probably a couple off).
I debated on whether a post was in order for this or not. The last thing I want is to come across as though I'm looking for encouragement and support. Obviously, I would welcome any help I can get, but I have attempted this enough in the past to know that the decision to light up again or not rests solely on me.
Which is why I felt putting this out there might help. For one, it's something that I can constantly refer back to whenever I need. It also helps (or so I've heard) to put it down your reasons for quitting in writing somewhere. Having this "public" knowledge also holds me accountable to some extent. I will be honest with this. If I cheat and have one, the counter will be reset. If I give up altogether, the counter will come down and I'll publicly wave the white flag. I know that there's a solid chance this will not be the last time I quit smoking. But I at least want that A for effort.
At 28 years old, I have a hard time running around the park once with my dog. There have been days when just the act of jumping up a couple flights of stairs to street level leaves me a little winded. While no one in my family has ever died of lung cancer, cancer itself is no stranger to my relatives. I don't feel that I've lived long enough to be tempting that kind of fate. I'm sure my lungs look a bit tepid, blackened and shriveled. And it smells bad. So, no more. It's killing me and I don't have that kind of death wish quite yet.
Any of you who have attempted this before know the irritability that it brings on. The slightest and most miniscule thing can set one off on a murderous rampage Wes Craven couldn't even imagine. So I ask for your prayers. Not necessarily for me or for my success in this endeavor.
But for the lives of the buffalo upstairs.
Close it up.