Probability & Statistics Part Deux

Okay, okay..... So I did the math and here's the deal.

If Jesus shows up sometime within the next two weeks, you can be fairly certain (re: 78% certain) that the U.S. will advance to the next round of the World Cup.

Should that happen, you can also expect Landon Donovan's hair to return to it's fuller, thicker, blonder, gayer look.

Now.... ....Then.