Stocks rose Wednesday morning, pushing the Dow Jones industrial average within a whisper of its all-time closing high of January 2000.
The sound you hear is that of teeth chipping as the result clenched jaws reporting on an economy doing well under the Bush administration.
Fear not for their dental well-being, though. Things start to relax a bit with the next sentence:
But the market's gains were limited by a surprise drop in durable goods orders, a mixed read on housing and some jitters as the the world's most widely watched stock market gauge approached the record.