You Know It's Bad....

... when you resort to a MySpace bulletin for a blog post. Embarrassing really. Phillies make the play-offs... My Davey is out of a job until April... Britney looses custody of her kids... Hillary wants to give 5 grand to every baby born....

All this stuff going on in the world, and I'm turning to MySpace for blog material. That's apathy for ya'.

Anyway. It's not a completely useless post. It is political in nature and I felt it would be a good way to let my dwindling readership in on where I stand on some of the more prevalent issues out there. Enjoy.

1. If you had to choose between being a vegetarian for the rest of your life, or eating nothing but meat the rest of your life, what would you do?

- Steak baby. And burgers. And bacon. And a helping of pork with a side of angioplasty.

2. Do you believe in Global Warming?

- Don't think you can deny that it's been warmer lately. What's causing it is up for healthy debate though. That said, I'm all for doing our part to keep the environment as clean as we can.

3. Republican, Democrat, Independent, Anarchist, Terrorist. . . Which party do you believe in?

- Registered Republican. Probably more Libertarian though. And when did the Anarchists and Terrorists form parties?

4. Pro-Life or Pro-Choice?

- Such a tough one. I'm probably more on the side of pro-life, but there are some situations where I feel it has to be the woman's call (i.e. rape). My biggest problem with it is when it is used as a form of birth control. We all know what happens when he sticks his dingly-dang in her hoo-ha. Should be prepared to deal with the consequences.

5. Would you date/marry someone of a different race? Would you adopt a child of a different race?

- Yes and yes.

6. Yankees or Red Sox?

- Yankees.

7. Do you think same-sex unions should be legalized?

- I honestly don't care what it's called. I just want the same rights.

8. Stem Cell Research. . . Aye or Nay?

- This is where I can be argued as a hypocrite as I'm actually kind of in favor of this.

9. Will you spank your children?

- Only when they misbehave. Or when I'm in the mood.

10. Do you think the U.S. should make English its official language?

- Uh. Yes.

11. Do you consider yourself "religious?" --> Do you think people who don't belong to your religion are going to be punished for their disbelief?

- To some extent. I think all the major religions have gotten it wrong in one way or another. If there is a Creator, I doubt He put people on this earth for the express purpose of burning in Hell because they have a particular belief.

12. Do you think Homeless people "did it to themselves" or are "unfortunate?" --> Would you give a Homeless person money? --> Would you support euthanasia of the Homeless if it was brought up in Congress?

- I'm sure there's probably a healthy mix of both. I have given money to the homeless in the past, but more out of annoyance than sympathy. I wouldn't support killing them though.

13. If your family was starving, would you steal to provide for them? --> Would you steal for fun?

- Yes. No.

14. If someone murdered your loved one, would you murder them? --> Would you murder a complete stranger, if you knew you couldn't get caught?

- I'd like to think I would be better than to stoop to their level of evil. But if given the chance, I couldn't say for certain.

15. If your significant other hit you, would you stay with them? --> Do you think it's okay to hit your loved ones?

- No. No.

16. Have you ever cheated on someone? --> Do you think cheating is an inevitable response to animal biology, or a moral lack of character?

- No. I think it's a mixture of both even though I feel the "animal biology" thing is a bit of a cop-out.

17. War in Iraq. . . Aye or Nay? --> Would you feel differently if you had a loved one in the military?

- Aye. Although it's been handled more that poorly. My sister was in Afghanistan, so no... I don't feel differently.

18. Bush. . . Friend or Foe?

- Retard.

19. Hillary Clinton. . . Friend or Foe?

- Bull-dyke.

20. Barack Obama. . . Friend or Foe?

- Just plain 'ole nuts.

21. Do you think alternative means of childbirth/conception, (i.e. in vitro, surrogate mothers, test tube), are okay?

- Yes.

22. Should Britney Spears have her children taken away?

- Bitch already did. "Gimme more" indeed.

23. Do you support the U.S. Space Program? --> Do you believe in aliens?

- Absolutely. And I hope someone else is out there so Bush can challenge them for interstellar domination.

24. Do you think cloning is okay?

- I don't think we're ready for it's implications at this point, so.... no.

25. Do you think marijuana should be legalized? --> If marijuana were legalized, would you smoke? --> Would you stop being friends with someone due to smoking marijuana?

- No. No. Probably not.

26. Would you try any drug besides marijuana? --> Would you stop being friends with someone due to drug use?

- No. Depends.

27. Do you believe in Capital Punishment? --> Would your opinion change if you or a loved one were convicted of 1st degree murder?

- Yes. No.

28. Do you think the government was involved in the attacks on 9/11?

- Heh. YES I DO! THE TOWERS WERE RIGGED WITH EXPLOSIVES. HOLOGRAPHIC PLANES WERE USED. A MISSILE WAS FIRED AT THE PENTAGON. AND FLIGHT 93 NEVER EVEN EXISTED. /sarcasm No... People who buy into this shit are fucking stupid.

29. Do you think there should be international disarmament of nuclear weapons?

- In an idyllic world, yes.

30. Gun Control. . . Aye or Nay?

- To some extent. Bottom line is though, the people whom this type of legislation targets (violent criminals) are going to find a gun no matter what law is passed.

31. Do you think the American prison rehabilitation system works? --> Would you hire an ex-con?

- Is that what they are now? Rehabilitation systems? I thought it was supposed to be some type of punishment. Hmmm... my bad.

32. Does Paris deserve to go to jail? --> Do you drunk drive?

- Yes she does. I have in the past when I was young and stupid.

33. Plastic Surgery. . . Aye or Nay?

- I guess if it makes you feel better about yourself.

34. Do you think that those living below the poverty line are "lazy" or that it is a "social construct" which causes their situation?

- A bit of both again, with the "social construct" used too much as a crutch.

35. Nature or Nurture?

- Nature.

36. Do you think women's liberation is the cause of the "deterioration" of the American family?

- I think radical liberalism is the cause of the deterioration of the American family.

37. PETA. . . Aye or Nay?

- I love animals but hate PETA.

38. When you see an animal in the road, do you swerve or keep driving? --> Do you believe that animals have "souls"?

- I will try to avoid it. Souls I'm not so sure of. But feelings, you bet.

39. Would you burn down part of the rain forest to plant crops? --> What if it was your only source of food?

- If it was my only option for food, then yeah.